Articles by Jacob Lambert

March 31, 2017

Trump in the Bardo 0

After a time, Mr. Vollman said, If that man is the President, I believe I would prefer to stay on here. To remain within my sick-box, apart from the other place. The Reverend and myself, I am saddened to report, were obliged to agree.

March 22, 2017

A Guy Who Wants His Friends to Read the Book He Wrote: An Oral History 4

At one point he told me it was, like, a crime thriller? But then at another point, it sounded like he was writing a comedy, but with sports in it. And then he said it was an “elegiac meditation on life,” but when he said it, I’m pretty sure he mispronounced “elegiac.”

February 23, 2017

President Donald J. Gantry: On the Prescience of Sinclair Lewis 1

If you want a guide to how we’ve come to find ourselves in such a bewildering, dangerous place — and to how we might, in the future, avoid such empty hucksters — choose Elmer Gantry. It’s one of Sinclair Lewis’s best. And it’s the story of Donald Trump.

January 23, 2017

‘A Walk in the Woods’ vs. A Walk in the Woods: On Reading as a Substitute for Experience 4

Reading is an incredible thing, but it’s a poor substitute for life.

January 9, 2017

How I Got It: ‘Breakfast of Champions’ 6

That I could have found a book that so enflamed me in such a serene, well-meaning place now seems to me a rude and minor marvel.

December 4, 2016

A Year in Reading: Jacob Lambert 7

What better way to distance myself from Donald Trump’s noxiousness than to read about an eerily quiet, snowed-in hotel, written decades before the terms ‘basket of deplorables’ and ‘nasty woman’ entered the vernacular?

November 23, 2016

Like a Fried Egg Sliding off a Fat Man’s Naked Thigh: 18 Incredible Fair-Use Similes 0

As a public service, I’m supplying the general public with the following fair-use similes. Sprinkle them throughout your own writing and be amazed by the lift in the overall quality of your work.

October 31, 2016

The Five Scariest Books Ever Written 6

Here are five absolute chillers that will have you turning pages deep into the night — and are guaranteed to have your teeth a-chattering as you pray for the sun to rise!

October 20, 2016

How I Got It: Snoop Doggy Dogg’s ‘Doggystyle’ 0

Cash in hand, I likely lied to my parents about where I was going — playing basketball with friends, not searching for murder-and-misogyny-filled music — and set out.

September 28, 2016

A Fourth Time, I Ask: Are Picture Books Leading Our Children Astray? 6

There are simply too many books on our children’s shelves that, through deceptively cheery artwork and sly subversion, are destroying our tots from within.